How do I stop seeking others’ approval?: Ask Dr. Julie Hanks

In this bonus podcast episode I talk with Dr. Jennifer Douglas about March’s theme in the Dr. Julie Hanks Group Coaching Membership: How do I stop seeking others’ approval?

In this dynamic conversation we uncover the roots of perfectionism, share phrases and mantras that help battle perfectionist thinking, talk about how overfunctioning at home is a form of perfectionism, discuss the benefits of breaking free from approval seeking, share how to deal with the guilt that accompanies leaving perfectionism behind, and more. This is a conversation you don’t want to miss!

Here’s a taste of what you’ll learn when you listen to the episode:

Me: What does it look like when women in your practice stop seeking other people’s approval? What’s the reward for working on this?

Dr. Jen: Perfectionism is this huge double-edged sword because it’s a reassurance-seeking behavior. We want to feel loved, successful, etc., but what it does is it actually keeps us in a very small and narrow idea of what our life is and what it could be. … When we start to recalibrate away from external expectations—dotting the Is and crossing the Ts—and focusing on what other people want, suddenly there’s this huge amount of time and energy we have back. We get to focus on what we want to do and we get to discover who we are. Many people are discovering who they are for the first time in adulthood, and i’ve seen women literally come alive. There’s a different type of happiness when you’re not constantly rushing toward this finish line that keeps moving… They feel settled and they feel like they can finally rest and be satisfied with what they have.

Me: What i’m hearing is a sense of internal peace, and then an expansion of possibilities. You’re settled inside but then externally there’s all these other possibilities to explore because you’re not being confined by other people’s expectations.

Dr. Jen: Yes!

All during March we’re talking about how you can stop seeking others’ approval in the  Dr. Julie Hanks Group Coaching Membership. It’s an affordable way to work with me and be part of a community of women who are striving for emotional health.

For $39/mo (a fraction of the price of therapy or 1:1 coaching) you get:

☀️3 group coaching sessions(sessions are recorded to view anytime)

☀️Access to all of my courses (including NEW Boundaries course)

☀️Membership in a private Facebook community of women

☀️Access to all past group coaching calls

☀️And more!

Start your membership today at drjuliehanks.com/membership.